Oh, COME ON, People

Porn star paid $500,000 to have an RMT site’s logo and URL engraved on her assets.

I mean… really. Come on. I know it’s Monday, but… really. I see terabytes of “pics or it didn’t happen” in our future. And it’s an ugly, cold future.

But as always when gold farming is involved, THERE ARE SHENANIGANS.

I have done the unthinkable and actually researched this mindblowingly retarded press release, and apparently “Anna Morgan” hasn’t appeared in any films, pornographic or otherwise. The IAFD, the porn version of the IMDB, returns no hits. Googling “Anna Morgan porn” returns… pages of entries about this press release.

I really hate to point out the stupidly obvious here, but if I was going to spend $500,000 on body modification advertising, I would spend it on a nubile starlet who had actually, you know, some notoriety. Heck, I’m pretty sure Paris Hilton would be down.

But really, if you want to know what’s going on… go to the source.

anang

So, to recap:

  • The porn industry is probably not branching out into WoW gold sales
  • One RMT web site has discovered a new way to gain tons of publicity through exploiting both the credulity of the media and, most likely, his girlfriend.
  • The Easter Bunny doesn’t exist, either.
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43 Responses to Oh, COME ON, People

  1. J. says:

    pics or it didn’t happen
    this is the primary rule of the intarwubz

    Also, wearing a t-shirt does not count as “engraving”.

  2. pharniel says:

    this is the end…my only friend…
    maybe the down market and the maturity of the market means the end of the ‘easy money’ days.

  3. Freakazoid says:

    I’d like to engrave something on her assets, if you know what I mean.

  4. Daniel says:

    Oh COME ON people, you know you’d hit that.

  5. geldonyetich says:

    Like any good lie, it does have a core of plausability to it: if you’re paying third parties to slate your instant gratification for sex without grinding relationships, maybe you’d also pay third parties to slate your instant gratification for virtual spoils without grinding MMORPGs.

  6. Vetarnias says:

    As Geld said, it seems plausible. After all, I can remember a case where a certain online casino paid an insultingly small amount for a woman (living in poverty, if I remember) to have the casino’s name permanently tattooed on her forehead.

    Here it goes, and it was for $15,000:

    http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/07/01/casino_tattoos_womans_face/

    About this story, what bothers me is that people didn’t bother checking it out before reproducing it all over the Internet.

  7. Gx1080 says:

    The issue is that you need at least twice as much money for getting a real porno star to do that. Or other things. So they went cheap. I cannot be surprised considering that this people are the ones that are perfectly happy destroying the MMO industry and treating the people of third-world countrys as slaves for a profit, so its not surprising that they are greedy bastards.

    Or perhaps its my distaste for the gold mining industry and its public face: Jonathan Fucker.

  8. chabuhi says:

    @Daniel

    Correction: They know they’d LIKE to hit that.

    Just sayin’

  9. Mark Asher says:

    It’s cheap and easy to write a press release. I remember years ago for awhile Interplay was into crazy press releases. One time they had some TB strat title coming out that was about aliens invading our planet, and they put out a press release saying they’d offered the US Military 200,000 free copies of the game so they could train for an alien attack and be ready.

  10. IainC says:

    The photoshop work on grafting that girl’s head onto a significantly bustier torso is pretty well done though.

  11. Paks says:

    THE EASTER BUNNY DOES SO EXIST!!!

    *runs off crying*

  12. TPRJones says:

    She looks so much better ont he right.

  13. Jeremy Preacher says:

    That doesn’t have to be a ‘shop, given how she’s got her arms positioned in the left hand pic. It’s not all that hard to generate copious cleavage by a little judicious compression.

    That said, a) she does look much better on the right and b) the older I get, the more grossed out I am by the knee-jerk “I’d hit that” comments. Not that y’all *think* it (I certainly thought it) but that you *post* it. Boys are icky.

  14. IainC says:

    Jeremy Preacher :
    That doesn’t have to be a ’shop, given how she’s got her arms positioned in the left hand pic. It’s not all that hard to generate copious cleavage by a little judicious compression.

    Pics or … wait, I’m going to get thumped aren’t I?

  15. Chris F says:

    The real depressing part is that gold farms are making enough money to be able to afford that kind of advertising (if it is indeed true. I mean, it’s on the interwebs so it must be right?)

  16. Arkenor says:

    Ferraro has a new gig then… Maybe even two of the Ferraros.

  17. morphene says:

    Heh, nice find on the picture. It’s amusing to google the “media relations” contact for mymmoblahblah.com. Just a few months ago apparently the company was bought out of the blue for US$10M (see a… uh, trend here?) but just before that Hunter was responsible for such hard hitting journalism as “Learn To Start A Pet Photography Business”, “Role of The Druid WOW”, “Where Is The Female G-spot” and who can forget the classic: “How To Make Money Playing The Lottery”. I swear I’m not making any of these up.

    Relating to the girl, though, you can find her as Hunter’s avatar placed last year on a number of article spamming sites including here: http://www.lookuppage.com/users/huntercrowell/ . Girlfriend? The author? I don’t know but clearly not a Russian porn star. Pretty amusing example over all of better living through press releases.

  18. Syncaine says:

    Eurogamer knows this is not only legit, but swears by their statement.

    Honestly though, this might be a new low for press.

  19. Mercury says:

    Lum,

    I contend that you only Googled her name in order to see the boobies. Sure, it turned into an innocent research mission, but that was only after you came up empty-handed (so to speak).

  20. Moorgard says:

    Clearly the only way I can validate or debunk this story is to watch hours and hours of Russian porn.

    In other words, my usual Monday.

  21. Freakazoid says:

    @TPRJones
    I disagree. The right screams out “I’m a total bitch who doesn’t put out.” Plus her breasts don’t appear as big and those must be big in order to attract a sexy male such as myself.

    @Mercury
    There was nothing empty in his left hand while he searched, if you know what I mean.

  22. J. says:

    I’d think engravings on boobies would be a professional hazard for porn stars.

    Of course you can technically be a “porn star” by having sex on camera and having the video distributed … somehow.

  23. TPRJones says:

    Freakazoid :I disagree. The right screams out “I’m a total bitch who doesn’t put out.”

    No way, that picture on the right screams out “I’m the girl next door that publically appears to be a nice girl, but am secretly a total slutty freak in the sack with anyone but Freakazoid.”

  24. IainC says:

    Syncaine :
    Eurogamer knows this is not only legit, but swears by their statement.
    Honestly though, this might be a new low for press.

    I see what you did there.

  25. Raad says:

    Come on Scott, there are much more weirder things on the internet, this is like really tame and I’m surprised it didn’t already happen. I THOUGHT YOU HAD A TASTE OF SECOND LIFE MAAAAAN

  26. Boanerges says:

    This brings a whole new meaning to “I’d buy that for a dollar”

  27. Iggep says:

    What do you mean the Easter Bunny doesn’t exist?!?!?!

  28. UnSub says:

    I look forward to Darkfall copying this media stunt.

    Only with actual engraving, because they are, y’know, hardcore.

  29. geldonyetich says:

    Adventurine pays male prostitute to tattoo Darkfall Online on testicles.
    Unexpected side effect of impotence.

  30. Stabs says:

    She’s Ferraro really.

  31. […] breasts would probably be slightly more impressive. I’m rather disappointed that this story looks like it was a hoax. I suppose it is plausible given that some people will do pretty much anything for money (and I […]

  32. Dan Gray says:

    @geldonyetich

    It would take some serious balls to do that.

    *kapow*

  33. Hatch says:

    so this was a titoo?

  34. Syncaine says:

    Hatch wins the thread.

  35. Zuzax says:

    Remove the commas from the title and you pretty much have the porn industry in a nutshell…

  36. Raad says:

    @Zuzax
    hahahahahaha

  37. LabRat says:

    So you’ve just paid some russian porn star $500,000US . . .

    What makes you think she’s EVER going to make another porn film with that in the bank?

  38. Axecleaver says:

    For those struggling with the dollar figure, I think the point of the thread is that there is no porn star, there is no $500k, and you can’t believe everything you read on the Internet. Especially press releases.

  39. dragonblade629 says:

    J. :
    pics or it didn’t happen
    this is the primary rule of the intarwubz
    Also, wearing a t-shirt does not count as “engraving”.

    WRONG

    Intraweb is different then the internet. To totally opposite prefixes.

  40. Cedia says:

    Isn’t this called fraud? And can’t these “journalists” get fined for doing stuff like that?

  41. TPRJones says:

    Fined by whom? You can print whatever you want, there’s no Accuracy Authority to fine you if you print wrong things. Perhaps there could be a lawsuit, but only the named “Anna Morgan” would have any sort of standing.

  42. Zuzax says:

    Cedia :
    Isn’t this called fraud? And can’t these “journalists” get fined for doing stuff like that?

    OK, I will write them a letter telling them they better knock this stuff off if they know what’s good for them. Otherwise, I shall fine them $10. And a picture of Anna Morgan’s boobies.

  43. geldonyetich says:

    A couple days ago, I came across the works of a Steve Pavlina. Seems like a great guy with so much awesome advice that he’s regularly featured on lifehacker.

    Then you look into him a little deeper and, oh my, what’s going on here or with Ferraro is small potatoes.

    The method is the same: say something is happening that is not and cash in on people’s ability to discern the truth for themselves. However, the scale is much greater, and Pavlina’s cunning enough to pull it off in such a way that it’s indistinguishable from he’s trying to help.

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